Bunkies Connie and Andrea are getting ready to hit the GE kitchen and Connie reveals she’s never roomed with anyone before she met her husband. Maybe that’s what is preventing her from freaking out–ballerinas only cry alone? She says, “I’m feeling the pressure, I want to prove I can cook great food, I’m here to represent.” She looks shaky. Maybe she’s been having nightmares of “I’m in it to win it” Andrea smothering her with a pillow.
Quick Fire
Guest Chef is Roger Mooking owner of Nyood and Kultura and host of TFN’s “Everyday Exotic” The challenge “cook by numbers”. How well can each chef put together a dish using a specific number of ingredients?
They draw knives and it goes down like so: Dale 12, Dustin 8, Francois 14, Connie 10, Darryl 4, Rob 16, Andrea 6. Salt, pepper and oil are freebies.
Darryl is slightly panicking–he may cook simply but 4 ingredients is basic. Once he grabs a protein, starch and veg he’s only got one item left. Does sweat count as an ingredient?
Dale of course is not fussed, “I don’t know why everyone is stressing out.”
Connie gets intense and decides to make her own pasta in 45 minutes. Andrea goes the other route– “hard to screw up” as she says. Hello butternut squash soup. (seriously?)
But you know what–her plating looks gorgeous, the roasted butternut squash soup is contained a bright blue Le Creseut pot with maple, foie gras and hazelnut oil, garnished with garlic and squash chips.
Dustin’s squab also looks great as does Francois’s grilled sardines and grilled peach, though I think most of his 14 ingredients are lamely hidden in a bunch of “different” salad greens.
Chef Mooking thinks that Dale’s mussel broth might be a bit too saffrony. “Not too saffrony” Dale shoots back. (are too! am not!)
He also is surprised that Connie would make pasta that needs resting time with only 45 minutes. She one-ups him, “yep, especially since I used semolina.” Translated: I can pirouette on your ass.
Rob used about 12 kinds of radish (red, black, green, mauve….) to make up his salad for his 16 ingredient dish.
FINAL JUDGEMENT: It comes down to Connie and Andrea as stand-outs. But Andrea takes the Quickfire with her “bold flavours and great balance–you’ve hit it out of the ball-park.” Losing apparently causes Connie to lose all motivation in the Elimination round. Or inspires a great need for comfort food.
Elimination
The elimination challenge this week is summed up by Thea as, “taking your personal cooking style and translating it into a recipe that any home cook can understand.” Translation: we’ll be cooking with products supplied by our sponsor, Loblaws.
Chef Mooking tries to make it all feel more exciting by describing the challenge as “satisfying the home cook–and chef–in all of us.” I sum it up as the home cook in me saying, “just defrost something for God’s sake” and the home chef in me saying, “let’s order hand-rolled sushi for pick-up”. (If you’re Chef-At-Home though you conveniently find some hand-rolled sushi in your pantry and make a stew with it.)
Each chef picks a bunch of PC products (and let me say right now that I love the PC line–my darling sparkling fruit juice) and shops at Loblaws for the rest of the ingredients. They each have $50 to prepare samples for 35 people. Andrea, winning the Quickfire has an unlimited budget and buys a whack of black cod (they swim in whacks actually….).
Insert a bunch of shots of the chefs talking…all very boring and repetitive and space-filler style stuff…
Connie has a wicked gleam in her eye. “I saw puff pastry and was inspired!” But wait for it, she’s essentially going to make pigs in a blanket–the twist being that she’s making the sausage. One: you’ve already made sausage, Con. Two: No one is going to make sausage at home, even the Italians only do it once a year recruiting their entire families and getting through it by drinking a tonne of home-made wine.
She then adds, “we need to cater to housewives and other people who shop at Loblaws” (yes, us housewives always on the search for a new devilled egg or pastry-wrapped sausage recipe). She says this as she purees foie gras and starts rolling sausage in saran wrap. Connie–are you cracking?! Hang in their girl!!
Rob sums it up, “I don’t know why anyone would make sausage at home when they can just buy a hot dog.”
And then there is the stunned look on the shoppers faces as Connie explains that “making foie gras truffled sausage is easy–maybe an hour and half of work!”
Dale is kicking ass with his BBQ pulled pork with coleslaw on a bun. A square of salty watermelon on the side. He knows what he’s doing this time–this is no Milestones challenge, “BBQ has a power over people.” And he’s right. He is also Dustin’s BFF! Cut to Dale happily folding Dustin’s colourful socks.
Dustin, ‘I like a little flare in my socks’ and Dale, “I like standard undergarments. Black and grey.”
Are there cameras in the bathrooms too? Is this material we’ll see next week when there’s one less chef to use up screen time?
I do enjoy the juxtaposition of this exchange back to back: Rob (with a slight repulsion) , “Wow, people love free food.”
Darryll, “My girlfriend and I love to sample, we have a strategy so we can double up on the hand-outs.”
But to the judges:
They are in love with Dale’s BBQ sandwich. Devour it actually. Even a housewife could make it they conclude.
Andrea’s marinated black cod dish– the flavour is there but needs seasoning. Underwhelmed.
Francois makes a yummy looking chicken confit in phyllo and is having a great time demo-ing how to fold the phyllo pastry to curious customers. The judges conclude that though you can buy this type of dish frozen, Francois has elevated it by making it from scratch.
Unlike, Connie’s pigs-in-a blanket. Judges with raised eyebrow, “just a simple foie-gras truffle sausage? uh-huh.” And sadly it doesn’t taste any better than the frozen version. I am getting flustered, what is happening to Connie?
Dustin redeems himself from his gnocchi flop last week with gnudi in brown butter. Chef McEwan finally admits that Dustin’s “cute-factor” is getting to him. In a warm, fuzzy way.
Rob kills it with his dessert, its also redemption time for him after the poo-log he served up last week. He creates a maple-syrup custard with caramelized banana on top. Everyone from the housewives to the judges are literally, eating it up. Chef Mooking freaks out at its deliciousness. “Everything about this is right.”
And then there’s Darryl, where everything about his manicotti is just…wrong. It’s simple that’s for sure but it is also amateur say the judges. It did not elevate the food to…well..anywhere but the plastic plate it is served on. I think the real epiphany should have been when a 20 year old college kid says, “hey, I could totally make this!”
Judges Table
Top Three:
Francois, Dale and Rob. But it is obviously between Dale and Rob. (I must say though, look at Francois–kind of staying middle of the pack and then slowly rising to the top over all these episodes. Things that make you go hmmmmm.)
All the judges drool over Rob’s dessert but Dale wins the prize. And indeed there is a prize. Five thousand dollars worth of President’s Choice money (this show is better than Monopoly) which Dale says he will partly use for his son’s school.
Bottom two:
Obvious, yet kind of shocking. Connie and Darryl. Chef Mooking sums up Darryl’s issues with, “this show is called Top Chef, not Good Cook.”
And then everyone is a total over-the-top jerk to Connie “are you tapped out?” “did you choke?” until she actually starts to cry. And then cries harder for being seen crying on TV and not being a strong female role model (Then I start to cry.) Someone wrap her in a puff pastry blanket and give her a hug! Andrea does.
As expected Darryl is sent to pack his knives. “He’s still a young, young chef” is the judges’ conclusion. I hope next time he’s at Costco they have really super samples waiting for him! Bye Darryl.
Next week: the chefs prepare 3 meals, “a day in the life of Canadian Food”. Huh? (I think Gordon Pinsent might play the voice of the back bacon sandwich.)
Til next week.
cheese and toast 