Monthly Archives: October 2011

October 28, 2011 · 12:17 pm

The Grossest Thing I’ve Seen in a Long Time

I discovered “Blood Syrup” at the Dollarama today while looking for loot bag treats for a Halloween party.

I don’t know what part of BLOOD SYRUP  most repulsed me the most:

*the fact that corn syrup is the first ingredient followed by sugar

*the fact 100G (1/2 the bag) of blood syrup is considered a “serving”

*or just the fact that this is meant for consumption at all.

I picked it up thinking it was fake blood.  My plan was to smear it on my face and head and lie limply at the bottom of the stairs on Halloween morning.

But then I saw that the bottom tube ends in a straw/ tube which kids can suck on. You know, I bet the Frankenstein gummis I just consumed  are also made of the same ingredients, but in liquid form, I can’t handle it.

Yet I was raised on corn syrup.  My mother would mix it with milk and put it in my bottle as an infant (this is true–it was cheaper than formula).

But she never dyed it red.  That’s just GROSS.

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October 20, 2011 · 1:41 pm

Toast Post: Let’s call it “camping Brie”

Strangely enticing.

Have jug o’ wine, need cheese pairing?  This was my first thought when I received a little package of new products from Agropur the other day.  Three of their fine cheeses have been packed into spreadable format.

OKA, Brie L’Extra and Champfleury can now be scooped out of little 100g, recyclable plastic containers and straight onto you baguette.  It is suggested they can also be used as dips or easily melted into sauces.  To be perfectly honest it was hard to get beyond “spreadable” without jumping to Cheez Whiz conclusions.

You may be licking your lips if you’re one of “those” that doesn’t eat the rind of a Brie.  Yet, even as I disapprove of such antics, I must assume that you actually like the taste of a “Brie” that is not also referred to as a “processed fine cheese spread” and does not list “cheddar” as an ingredient.  Which is what you’re getting here.  It tastes kind of fake.   Not horribly bad–I enjoy a Kraft singles in a grilled cheese afterall-but, it’s not fine cheese.

I spread “the spread” on my toast, topped it with pear and have an surprisingly enjoyable lunch.   Fast and tidy it was.  If someone melted this into a silken sauce over my broccoli I’d probably think it was awesome.  It would also fair brilliantly packed in a camping cooler.

But while it might be OK to call Katy Perry “fine cheese”,  it just ain’t gonna fly with these guys.  But if you’re looking for an upscale take on Laughing Cow, dig in and see what you think.

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October 18, 2011 · 7:30 am

What sandwich should I bring to “Occupy Wall Street”?

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October 12, 2011 · 1:27 pm

My New Tailgating Lifestyle

So many glistening condiments!

Tailgate Party, here I come.  According to Wikipedia, I don’t even have to like sports to hang out in a parking lot with a portable slow cooker.  SEE HERE.  Nor do I have to own a vehicle with a tailgate.  I just have to consume alcohol and grilled food in a social setting.  DONE.  As for the parking lot…  If I get a parking permit I can drink beer and eat chicken wings in my car, parked right outside my house.  And the bonus? No  need for a port-a-potty as a  real bathroom is just steps away (if you consider a 1970’s lavender toilet and sink a real bathroom).

I found this TAILGATE magazine at Wal-Mart (issued by Better Homes and Gardens).   Right away I thought, if “Grab a chip! Nine ways to Dip!” doesn’t fit into my new vegetarian-ish lifestyle, then I don’t know what does. (Count ’em!  1. Spinach-dill 2. Roasted pepper hummus 3. Corn and black bean chutney guacamole 4. tomatillo salsa 5. Spinach-Articoke-Blue cheese and bacon (all vegetarians still eat bacon) 6. Mexican seven layer 7. Chocolate Fruit Dip and 8. something called Amaretto fluff…..hopefully there’s  not a kitten involved)

OK, OK,  #9 is a Cheeseburger dip, but if you’ve got 8 veggies dips, who’s going to notice?

Don't deny this cuteness

Once you see what’s inside this magazine may never need to by another cookbook:

**Recipe for Root Beer Float Cake

**Recipe for a White Chili made with chicken, sour cream and whipping cream (you can use 10% if you’re cutting back on fat)

**Recipe for Grilled Paella w/ sausage

**A “Timings and Temperatures” chart that covers beef, lamb, pork, chicken, turkey, fish and seafood (it’s colourful and you can tear it out!)

**And calorie and sodium reduction tips like, “pack your bun with only half the massive amount of Texas Beef Brisket that you usually do”

**Best of All– A taste-test of 16 hot sauces purchased at hotsaucedepot.com  (it’s almost enough to have discovered a Hot Sauce Depot)

So laugh and feel superior as you eat your salmon hand-roll, but just know that you’re not having nearly as good a time as the gal eating the Ragin’ Cajun Wings while sipping a Bloody Mary in the back of her Subaru.  (Also,  I know you’re drooling over the magazine cover, not the nori wrap on your sushi.)

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Filed under All Recipes, Cookbooks, Magazines (+recipes from), Ruminations on the Edible

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October 6, 2011 · 9:14 am

What do Swedish Fish think about?

Swedish fish are hard to gage.  Are they happy?  Sad?  Dead inside?

Despite their neutral expressions Swedish fish do have their opinions on things.  Especially the arts.   Here are some ice breakers.

MOVIES:

TELEVISION (big surprise….)

MUSICALS:

PHILOSOPHY: (huge Nietzsche fans)

Or for the really intellectual peeps (this is inside information)

See, now you don’t have to be so nervous striking up a conversation.

Unless you’re Plato.

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October 2, 2011 · 1:20 pm

Bacon Jam: The Edible Hairball You Don’t Want to Miss

You see what I'm saying?

BaJeaven.  Also known as Bacon Jam Heaven and actually better than heaven.  Used in a sentence, ” Man I was in BaJeaven after that gluteal massage.”

I dropped the hairball on Bacon Jam (aka Skillet Original Bacon Spread).   I am way behind the sizzle that has hit the Toronto bacon scene.

The Toronto Star and The Globe have written about it.   All the Best Fine Foods (read Jane Rodmell’s blog entry for some Bajeaven ideas) had the inspired idea to host a bacon jam-a-thon…with three Toronto chefs creating recipes using this scoopable bacon.  They included Claudio Aprile (Origin and Colbourne Lane), Chris McDonald of Cava/Xococava, and Nick auf der Mauer of Porchetta and Co.

And Nick Auf Der Mar achieved BaJeaven by adding excess to indulgence in a bacon jam, porchetta and crackling panini (seriously CRACKLING + BACON JAM–no one has tabulated how many people died from happiness yet..)

Ready to Hit the Heat

I made my own simple combo– Grilled cheese (caraway rye) with Cheese Boutique’s Vintage 7- Year Old Clothbound Cheddar, bacon jam and some arugula from the garden.

The salad in the BG is for display purposes only.

The arugula, which tasted BaJeavenly as part of the combo also made me feel like I had some health inserted into the grilled cheese.  Just throwing a bone out to the arteries.  BaJeaven is not always their favourite place.  Losers.

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October 1, 2011 · 11:00 am

Holy Crap! You need to Vote on this crucial matter.

I just learned how to post a poll.  If this one goes well I’m moving onto “What is the meaning of life?”

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